Maybe I'm Still Hooked...

I don't know....lately I've had a lot of people coming up to me asking why I act the way I do. Not all the time just around some people. Ok, maybe not some people just one person. But it's not like I make it obvious. It's not a crush, it's more like a disgust for this person. I don't like arrogant people. Especially when they don't have a goal for themselves. Then again I might be jumping to conclusions. I don't know much about this guy. All I know is that he and I are not as tight as we used to be. He changed a lot, I am not fond of the new him. He's a great guy, and very funny. But somewhere along the way we have become separate people. I don't talk to him unless I have to, and he does the same. He's a great teacher and he's very polite. He is lazy and spoiled however. And his lack of interest to his own culture is unlike any other. I am not fond of him. It started one night, when he decided to prove his coolness. He decided that he was ghetto enough to started cussing, or if I'm overexaggerating, he started to say some vulgar words. Either way if his mom was around he wouldn't have said those words. I hate the fact that he then chooses to make fun of me when I asked him not to say those words. I do not apreciate anyone who chooses not to respect. When I tell my mom about this she says it's because I don't respect myself enough to make people respect. Supposedly this should happen by the way that I dress. I do not like to conform to the rules of society. I enjoy being different. As long as it doesn't turn me into a prostitute, I'm good. But that's besides the point. I thought that maybe I acted this way because I may have had some leftover feelings for him. But this is just ridiculous. And if it was, I refuse to let anyone walk over me like a doormat. I love my mom to death, but this is where I draw the line. Admitting or wanting to like someone like him, would mean that I would do the same mistakes my mother once did. I will not let anyone disrespect me at all. It's true that I am teased and I have been teased my whole life. I know when to take a joke, I joke with myself all the time. But in this aspect of my life I am not my mother, and it is impossible for anyone to take advantage of me because of my emotions. So as to whether or not I like him, it's a no. I'm not so easily fooled. Besides I should never let people tell me how to act in order to impress a guy, he should be impressing me right? It's crazy how strong people think you are, by how much you do. Yet at the same time most people think you are too weak despite of how much you do. Most people do not know how to converse, myself included. It is sad. I think that may be why that guy and I never have anything nice to say to each other.